I woke up, it was raining,
Then I was walking down the streets.
My baby had left me
With nothing
But absinthe caca between the sheets.

Oh Lord! Have mercy on me!

Then I went into a church,
Where a preacher was preaching.
He had tried to teach me
To right: to kneel, to hate,
And not to masturbate.

Oh Lord! Have mercy on me!

I must rid myself of torment and woe,
Of the kind Lords may never know,
So I reach out for the only true relief.

Having no one that would blow,
I burnish my oboe.
Behold, this is the only true belief!

Don't hate - masturbate!